From Victim to Victory…

Have you ever been in that place in life where everything seems to constantly go wrong no matter what you do? For every step you take it seems that you are pushed back two steps. At times like this, I believe that people fall into one of three groups.

-The first (and most common) group will usually resort to complaining to others and  blaming life for the circumstances that have been “forced” upon them. These are the people who always feel like they are the victims of their circumstances and in some way feel like they have been wronged by life. These people over time develop an inner bitterness towards life and find themselves easily annoyed by the small things. You will usually find this group of people saying things like, “It’s not fair,” or “Why does this always have to happen.”

-The second group of people do not struggle with the troubles of being negative, their poison is found in the idea that their  circumstances are brought on by some outside force. This group of people believe that as long as they stay positive about the situation, that eventually it will change and that life will move on. Instead of taking action to pull themselves into the light, this group constantly sits in the darkness waiting for the light to be brought to them, and they will continue to wait. You will usually find this group of people saying things like, “I am waiting (not working) on my blessings,” or believing that if they keep doing the same thing eventually the situation will change.

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result”

-The third group of people have a completely different outlook on life. They understand that (in the words of Napoleon Hill) “Every adversity, and every failure, and every heartache, carries with it the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.” So when life does not go quite as they planned they are quick to find the benefit or lesson to be learned. By doing this, this group of people are able to interpret every situation and circumstance how they see fit.  This is the group of people that others call lucky or always seem to be at the right place at the right time. They are not lucky, and it is not mere coincidence that this is the group that will achieve success. Remember, luck is when opportunity meets preparation, and opportunity is always there! You will usually find this group of people saying things like, “To hell with circumstances, I create opportunities” or “Where you see risk, I see opportunity.”

Defining Yourself

At this point you must be honest with yourself. Which of the three groups do you belong to? If you are unsure, examine the people you most closely associate with and put them into one of the three groups. More than likely if the people you most closely associate with are in a specific group you probably are in that same group. Most of my life has been lived thinking  like the second group of people. My family raised me to believe that If you simply wait for something and remain positive, that it will eventually happen. You see I believed that as long as you were positive that eventually the situation had to change. What I had to learn was that unless you take action on how you want your life to be, the same uncomfortable situations will continue to show  up putting you right back where you started. This has  nothing to do with being negative (a positive attitude is only one part of the equation) but more so with being lazy and indecisive.


Remember, you are the captain of your ship and the master of your fate and that whether a circumstance is positive or negative simply depends on your interpretation. Before I graduated college I found myself with a corporate internship that paid good money. I thought that I had mastered life and that everything would be smooth sailing. But then the internship ended, and no full-time offer came. With the mindset of “as long as I am positive, something will happen,” I began to realize that simply waiting and being positive was leading no where. I started believing in myself and began to work on my craft daily, forgetting about corporate work or the fact that no money was coming in. In time I began to realize that there was greatness inside of me and began to spend every waking moment working on my skills. Through my own interpretation I realized that being unemployed allowed me to find the genius that I had inside of me all along, and that working at a cubicle would have greatly stifled  my genius and sense of freedom.

Remember, the world is too large a place to spend most of life behind a cubicle! (Timothy Ferriss)

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